


A New Dawn

by sara_bocchan (LittleSara)



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Canon Era, Episode Related, Episode: s03e03 Goblin's Gold, Hopeful Ending, Light Angst, M/M, Magic Revealed, Merlin Canon Fest, Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-28
Updated: 2020-09-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:36:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26424241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleSara/pseuds/sara_bocchan
Summary: Arthur'd had his suspicions about Merlin using magic, but when they catch the goblin together the signs get too obvious to keep ignoring them. Hence, they have "the talk".
Relationships: Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 116
Collections: Merlin Canon 2020





	A New Dawn

**Author's Note:**

> **Episode:** 03X03: Goblin’s Gold  
>  **Warnings:** -  
>  **A/N:** First of all, a big thank you to the mods for helping us through this challenging year with another great fest to participate in! All of this wouldn't be possible without you! <3<3<3  
> And just as importantly: A big shout-out to schweet_heart for betaing my story, again! <3 You are amazing and my story wouldn't be as good as it is without you! Thank you so much! <3<3<3
> 
> This year I almost managed to be on time with the submission date! You don't want to know HOW late I sometimes was the last years! :'D But this time I had the unbeta'd story ready by the due date. It's some progress, at least. xD  
> I am very happy with this years story, more than the last 2 years by a lot! I hope you guys will enjoy reading it, too! <3
> 
>  **Disclaimer:** Merlin characters are the property of Shine and BBC. No profit is being made, and no copyright infringement is intended.

Arthur ducked out of the way of a bucket and its rather nasty-looking contents being thrown at his head. He could feel a wet spot forming on his right shoulder but didn’t have time to look at the damage this goo was causing to his favourite tunic. The goblin was already across the room, picking books from a shelf and throwing them at Arthur and Merlin in turn.

Out of the corner of his eye, Arthur could see that Merlin had dropped the metal vessel they needed to trap the goblin. He wanted to shout at Merlin, tell him to pay attention and get a hold of the bloody vessel — but all that left his mouth was an angry bray.

Arthur hated this so,  _ so _ much.

Merlin looked at him, at first just looking a little confused but then his eyes widened in plain shock.

“Arthur!” Merlin shouted and tried to get up from his spot on the floor, but he immediately stumbled over some of the books that had piled up around him.

Too late, Arthur remembered that he shouldn’t watch Merlin, but the goblin. Said goblin had already transformed back into a small bright ball of light and was zooming straight for Arthur. He knew what that meant — he had seen the same light leave Gaius, after all. The goblin would take control of him now, and there was nothing he could do. Wide-eyed and glued to the spot in shock, he watched the goblin’s light rush towards him. 

A split second before the light reached him, something big flew past right in front of Arthur's face, making him pull his head back out of reflex.

Arthur blinked in confusion. The goblin was gone and he was pretty sure it was not possessing him at the moment. And what had—?

Merlin rushed past him and threw himself on top of the vessel, which, going by the angry sounds coming from it, now contained the goblin. Merlin was quick to close the hatch on the vessel and released a sigh of relief once it was safely sealed.

Before Arthur could actually relax too, Gwen cried out from the back of the room. “I can’t find the right bottle!” She sat on the floor behind one of the tables, surrounded by a pile of small bottles, all containing tinctures in different colours. One of them must contain the antidote for Gaius.

Merlin and Arthur rushed to her side and started to look through the pile. Arthur couldn’t really remember what the bottle with the antidote had looked like, other than that the tincture had been kind of white.There were at least half a dozen bottles that matched this description.

He picked up the one that resembled the bottle he remembered the most and held it out, just when Merlin did the same. Gwen looked between them, her hands shaking and eyes wide in panic.

“Which one?” she asked. Merlin looked at Arthur, cursed under his breath, and then dropped his bottle and took the one from Arthur’s outstretched hand instead.

Arthur wasn’t that sure about his find. He just hoped Merlin knew what he was doing. They rushed over to Gaius’ unmoving body on the floor, and Merlin poured the antidote into his mouth. It felt like multiple minutes despite only taking a couple of seconds — Arthur already thought they were too late or that it had been the wrong bottle after all — but then Gaius finally opened his eyes and replied to Merlin.

Arthur leant back and sighed in relief. He didn’t even care that the sound turned into a bray. They had done it! They had captured the goblin and saved Gaius’ life!

Together, they helped Gaius off the floor and onto his bed so he could rest for a bit. Arthur was eager to find a cure for his curse, but he knew the old man needed to rest more than Arthur needed to be able to speak, at least for a little while longer.

Merlin and Gwen started to tidy up the room and Arthur sat back in a chair and watched them absentmindedly. Now that everyone was safe, he couldn’t help thinking back to how the goblin had almost possessed him. He knew that Merlin had not even been near the vessel, not to mention he wouldn’t have had the time to throw it. Was there any way to explain this, without the use of magic?

No, no there wasn’t. Not that it surprised Arthur all that much. There was a reason he had insisted on helping with the goblin. He’d had his suspicions about Merlin for a while now, but there was never any proof. 

He didn’t know how to feel about being proven right. What he did know, though, was that they needed to talk about this, as soon as possible. Merlin was his best friend, although he would never admit that out loud. He couldn’t help feeling betrayed by him, but at the same time there was this hope, deep inside his heart, that maybe Merlin had a good enough explanation for everything. 

Arthur didn’t want to think about it too much. He wanted the truth, nothing else. When he thought about it by himself, there was nothing to stop him from jumping to conclusions. Even if Merlin had been keeping secrets from him all these years, he deserved a fair chance. He deserved to tell his part of the story.

Part of Arthur knew already that there was no way Merlin was an evil sorcerer, and that they would work things out, sooner or later.

That did not mean Arthur wouldn’t let Merlin sweat for a little bit, though.

First, however, Merlin needed to do something about this curse. After all, if he had to deal with a sorcerer for a servant, he at least should make himself useful, Arthur decided, nodding to himself.

Determined, Arthur sat up straight and called for Merlin—well, as much as he could call for him in his current state, anyway. This just proved the point, that he needed to be turned back to normal.

Merlin and Gwen looked at him from where they were still picking up books and bottles from the floor. Gwen was doing a way better job at hiding her amusement about the braying than Merlin was.

Arthur pointed at his ears and tried to explain that he wanted them gone  _ right now.  _

“Sorry, sire. I have no idea what you’re trying to say,” Merlin said, not even bothering to hide how funny he thought all this was. Arthur just glared at him even harder.

Gaius cleared his throat to Arthur’s right. Arthur turned to him, not even caring to reduce his glare, because if Gaius was now laughing at him as well—

He wasn’t. The old man had sat up on his cot and was now pointing to a piece of parchment and a feather on the table between them. One of his eyebrows slowly rose in disapproval when he noticed Arthur’s glare directed at him. Arthur felt bad immediately and tried to look as neutral as possible. He knew he was failing miserably.

He got up from his chair and leant over the table to pull the parchment closer to himself. He sat back down, picked up the feather and dunked it into the inkpot a little too aggressively, but he didn’t care.

_ Lift this curse from me. _

He held the parchment up towards Merlin, who had walked closer with an amused smile on his face, leaving Gwen to pick up the last few books by herself. The smile on Merlin’s face froze at once when he read Arthur’s message.

“W-what?” he asked. Playing the innocent; of course he would.

_ I know you can, now lift it already! _

Arthur contemplated threatening Merlin with the stocks if he didn’t comply, but decided against it. Arthur hadn’t put him in the stocks for years, and Merlin knew it was an empty threat. Besides, considering how all colour had already left Merlin's face just now, he was probably already scared enough as it was. So instead, he added:

_ We need to talk. _

Merlin was still standing in the same spot, frozen in place, eyes wide and looking at Gaius instead of him. When Arthur held the parchment up again, he had to wave it around for a bit to catch his attention. Merlin gulped visibly and read the added message. He swayed in place and held his hands in front of his chest to stop them from shaking.

He took a deep breath, and another, then looked straight at Arthur and nodded.

Merlin visibly hesitated for a moment before walking closer up to Arthur and taking the parchment from him with a shaking hand. He laid it down on the table, picked up the quill and started to write. His writing was even worse than usual due to his shaking hand. Arthur needed a few tries to decipher the words.

_ Gwen does not know. _

He gave Arthur a meaningful look that Arthur didn’t quite understand. What had any of this to do with Gwen? Arthur didn’t care if Gwen knew or not—

Then it clicked. Gwen didn’t know about Merlin’s magic, and Merlin wanted to keep it that way.

Arthur nodded once and then looked at Gaius. The old man was watching them with a stern expression. Merlin sighed and pushed the parchment towards Gaius before he straightened up and walked back to Gwen.

Gaius was quick to read the few lines, and then stared at Arthur as if he was trying to read his mind. Arthur wouldn’t put it past him if he actually did, magic or not.

In the background, he heard Merlin and Gwen talking. Merlin sounded all happy and chipper — he was a way better actor than Arthur gave him credit for. Arthur nodded at Gaius, not sure what he was trying to say by it, but it seemed to be the right answer anyway. Gaius’ glare subsided. He gave Arthur an encouraging smile, then broke the eye contact and reached for a book from the table. 

Arthur released a breath he hadn’t noticed he was holding, and turned around to wave Gwen goodbye. He did his best to put a smile on his face, but he knew he was failing miserably. If asked later, he could blame it on being cursed. Gwen looked unsure as well; she must have picked up on the change of mood. She didn’t argue, though, when Merlin encouraged her to check on Morgana, and left.

An uneasy silence fell over them, and for a second, Arthur feared he was in danger now that Gwen was gone, but then he pulled himself together. He pointed at his donkey ears again and brayed for good measure.

“Right,” Merlin said and walked up to the table. “There was a counter spell in the book about the goblin. We just need to find the book—”

“It’s right here, my boy,” Gaius interrupted, paging through a book in his lap. Merlin rushed around the table and sat down next to him.

Arthur watched them leaf through the book for a couple of seconds until they found the right page, stopping with an excited “ah-ha!” from Merlin. He moved his finger under the lines while reading, mumbling the words to himself.

“We need the goblin to lift the spell,” Gaius said and looked at Arthur expectantly. He rolled his eyes in return but got up and brought the vessel over to them. If he had known that knowing about Merlin's magic meant he’d have to help with it, he would have kept quiet. 

Probably. Maybe.

Anyway, he wasn’t keen on being involved with doing magic, but lifting this curse from himself — and everyone else in Camelot — had priority.

There was a voice at the back of his head that chimed in and said, maybe that was why Merlin was doing this too; he was just trying to help. Arthur chose to ignore the voice, for now at least. First, he wanted to talk to Merlin and find out everything he could. He especially wanted to know how much his servant — his friend — had lied to him over the last few years.

With a determined glare, he set down the vessel in front of Merlin, only barely missing his foot. Merlin pulled his feet back out of reflex and glared at Arthur, before remembering their current situation and looking apologetic instead. It was almost funny to watch all the emotions cross over Merlin’s face in such quick succession.

Well, all right, it was funny, at least for Arthur. He felt more in control of the situation, and additionally it felt a little bit like payback to Merlin for hurting Arthur’s feelings with all these stupid lies about stupid magic. Arthur watched Merlin intently, his arms crossed over his chest.

Merlin looked up at him, gulped visibly and then put the book down on his lap.

“Right,” was all he said, with a surprisingly steady voice. 

He lifted his right hand and hovered it over the vessel. Arthur saw Merlin’s eyes change to a golden glow when he started reciting the spell. It looked so unnatural, but at the same time so  _ right. _ Like something had finally clicked into place. 

The goblin shouted inside his prison and made the vessel shake where it stood, but to no avail. Arthur could feel the curse being lifted from himself.

When Merlin finished the spell, the glowing light in his eyes decreased and everything went quiet for a long, awkward moment. Arthur was very much aware that he was part of the reason for said awkwardness, as well as the fear and uncertainty written all over Merlin’s and Gaius’ faces, but he didn’t know what to do about it. There was still so much he didn’t know about Merlin and his magic. These things needed to be talked about before he could make a decision. Before he could relieve them of their fears.

He cleared his throat. “Good. Now, we need to talk.”

* * *

It was way into the night, probably close to dawn, when Merlin finished his story. Every time he had used magic in Camelot, every time he used it to save Arthur, or his friends, or the King. He had used his magic to save the King — who hated magic and would kill him for it, regardless of the life-saving! 

When asked why he would do something so foolish, he only said, it was for him — for Arthur — always.

Arthur sighed for the hundredth time that night, and rubbed his hands over his face.

The fire was burning low and the candles had all burned down by now, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. The darkness surrounding them was rather welcome, in fact, and kind of comforting.

He glanced at Merlin, who sat in the chair next to him, two goblets and a jug of water on the table between them. 

They had decided against wine for the night, and Arthur was very glad of it. He would be a lot tireder by now and less perceptive if he were drunk.

“You know what the worst part is?” Arthur asked in a low voice. “I’m not even angry about the magic — although I should be. But no. What I am really angry about is that you lied to me, all these years. I... I feel like I don’t even know you.”

Arthur watched Merlin’s reaction carefully. Even in the low light, it was easy to see the distress on his face.

“I’m sorry, Arthur,” Merlin answered, his eyes pleading for Arthur to believe him. He did, but Arthur wasn’t ready to admit that out loud. Not yet.

He contemplated for a moment whether he should ask the question that was burning on his tongue. Did he really want to know the answer? Maybe it would be easier not to know. At the same time, he would never be able to stop thinking about it if he didn’t.

“Then why did you never tell me? Do you really have so little faith in me?” Arthur heard his voice crack on the last part. He cursed his own weakness, and that he had shown it to Merlin now. Merlin must know how much this was actually hurting him.

Merlin didn't seem surprised about it, though. His eyes just started to water again. He hadn’t spilled a single tear yet — not even when he told Arthur about Balinor — but his eyes had been filled with tears multiple times, glistering in the low light of the fire.

Now, the first tear actually left Merlin's eye, running down slowly over his cheek, and he shouted with a raspy voice: “That’s not it! I trust you with my life!”

“Then why?!” Arthur barked back immediately.

"Because I never wanted to put you in this position!” More tears spilled from Merlin's eyes and he pushed them away furiously with his sleeve. 

Arthur forced himself to take a deep breath and calm down. They had managed until now without any shouting, without any arguing. He wanted to keep it that way, desperately.

Their friendship, their— their  _ bond  _ was worth more than that.

“What position?” Arthur asked in a calmer voice. It was a bit forced, but at least he tried.

Merlin must have tried to calm down too, because his voice was back to normal and the tears were gone from his face. He flailed with his arms, trying to emphasise his point. “A position where you had to choose between me and your father! It’s not fair—”

“So, what?” Arthur snapped. “You wanted to wait until, what? Until my father is dead? Oh, I can imagine how well that would have gone. ‘Arthur, so sorry about your father. By the way, I’m a sorcerer.’”

Arthur wanted to get up, to walk the room to calm his nerves, or maybe grab Merlin by the shoulders and shake him. It took all his willpower to do neither.

“All right, all right, I get it,” Merlin replied his hands held up in defeat. He slumped back into the chair and rested his head on his left hand, a defeated look on his face. He wasn’t even looking at Arthur anymore. It was the first time he had stopped looking at him since they’d sat down in front of the fireplace.

It was enough to make Arthur pause, and think about what Merlin had said.

Merlin was wrong to make this decision for Arthur, without even giving him a chance. It was wrong to lie to him, for years and years, while at the same time getting so close to Arthur’s heart. But Arthur had to admit, it was also very brave to risk his own life over and over again to save the people he cared for. It was foolish too, yes, but wasn’t it the same thing when Arthur went into battle against yet another magical creature he knew he couldn’t defeat?

Arthur had always thought Merlin to be brave. It was a huge comfort to realise that Merlin having magic didn’t change that. That, in a way, this meant the Merlin he thought he knew wasn’t fake. He did know Merlin, even before today. He just hadn’t known everything about him.

Knowing about Merlin’s magic didn’t change everything he knew about Merlin, as Arthur had feared. It simply added a missing puzzle piece to the greater picture. Or, well, more like a big pile of puzzle pieces, but Arthur didn’t want to ponder on that too much.

Instead, he chose to focus on the explanation Merlin had just given him.

“Is that really what you were worried about? Not about...?” Arthur didn’t dare say it, but going by the face Merlin pulled he knew what Arthur meant very well.

“Yeah, mostly,” Merlin said and shrugged. “I mean I still don’t know whether you will send me to the pyre or ban me from Camelot or something, but,” he paused and looked up at Arthur, “that was never what really worried me. I just never wanted to hurt you and tried to avoid the unavoidable, I guess.”

Merlin finished with another shrug and a forced smile. He lowered his gaze again and snuffled. 

Despite all his bravery, he was, apparently, not ready to ask what would happen to him now straight out. Arthur could tell that Merlin was trying to stay positive and hope for the best. It was visible in the way he had kept eye contact for most of the night, and the determination in his eyes. But the later it got, the more defeated he looked. Like he was ready to accept whatever decision Arthur made.

Arthur was sure that was exactly what Merlin had decided to do, and surprisingly that made his decision a bit easier. He knew he didn’t want Merlin dead, or hurt. But if Merlin stayed in Camelot, then he would be in constant danger of being caught.

If Merlin was caught, would Arthur be ready to risk everything to protect Merlin?

Part of him wanted to scream, ‘Yes! Yes I would!’ but the other part was still so angry, and hurt about being lied to and deceived for such a long time by the person he trusted the most. Arthur just wasn’t sure what to do.

“Honestly, I still don’t know what to do with you either. I just...” Arthur trailed off. 

Merlin looked up at him, his eyes wide and red-rimmed, but there was so much hope in them as well. Arthur forgot how to breathe for a moment. He knew he was mirroring the exact same, hopeful look back at Merlin. That they were thinking the same thing. 

_ I just don’t want to lose you. _

Neither of them said it out loud, not that it was necessary. Arthur knew they were on the same page, now. That this wasn’t the end to their friendship, but a new beginning, no matter how rocky.

The new morning’s light was growing outside the window, illuminating them both. Soon, dawn would break. They would have to leave Arthur’s room and present the goblin to the King, explain the happenings of the past few days.

It didn’t feel like as much of a chore as it had at the beginning of the night, Arthur realised to his own surprise. It would take them some time to work through this, but he already knew that it would be for the better. That it would be worth it. That he would never regret choosing Merlin over his father.

Merlin stretched out his hand towards him, his palm up.

“Let's figure it out together then, yeah?” The smile on Merlin’s face was small but still full of hope. Even in the dim light, there was no way to miss the sheer devotion and love he directed at Arthur.

Equally, there was nothing Arthur could have done but reach out as well, clasp their hands together tightly, and return the smile.

“Yes, together.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Constructive critique is always welcome! <3


End file.
